"Balloon Boy" Endnotes

18 Comments

by: Colorado Pols

Free-association tests worldwide associate the word “Colorado” with “Balloon Boy” today, something one can only pray will subside over time.

Because it’s not looking so good for the world-famous Heene family of Fort Collins, whose day yesterday went from bad to…well, we’re not sure what they were actually thinking through all of this, but the kid who didn’t fly 50 miles over eastern Colorado in a homemade balloon said something on CNN that has people wondering if it was all just a fabricated stunt on Larimer County Search and Rescue’s dime. That’s not very cool for all the millions of people who dropped what they were doing and glued themselves to the nearest television set yesterday.

And as cultural ambassadors for the great and tolerant state of Colorado, they’re not doing so well either. A rap video featuring the Henne children has surfaced, and, um, it’s kind of, well, horrifying:

That’s right, Dick Henne’s boys are not “pussified,” to the extent that around 2:55 they find a “faggot in a tree,” and the remedy for that little problem is to “pick up a rock and hit him in the cock.” Way to set our tourism desirability clock back to the ‘hate state’ Amendment 2 era. Oy vey.

As icky as teaching kids that kind of bigoted dreck will be to most people, there’s a simpler question about this incident Larimer County would like answered–that is, whether they need to send the Heenes a really large bill. Apparently they’ve brought in social services to make sure it’s not any worse than that, so let’s all regret having paid the attention we did to this, remind our out of state friends that they have throwback neighbors too, and never speak of it again.

18 thoughts on ““Balloon Boy” Endnotes”

Laughing Boy says:

October 17, 2009 at 3:36 am

How awful. The whole thing is so distasteful.

I’ve always had a huge problem with that “Wife Swap” show. Who would subject their children to some reality-show lunatic, even for a week or whatever.

Ick.

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1. ClubTwitty says:
  
  October 17, 2009 at 3:38 am
  
  but we agree
  
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Canines says:

October 17, 2009 at 4:07 am

Too pussified-sounding for these tykes.

Wonder if social services will request a command performance?

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The realist says:

October 17, 2009 at 4:59 am

might be more effective in slowing down these nutty parents than any assessment and safety plan the county social services folks might devise. The parents are clearly very proud of their crazy lifestyle – and they don’t even seem to have the sense to tone things down a bit for the best interests of their children. Interesting, too, that it’s been reported that there were three 911 calls (all hangups?) from their house this year. One, in February I believe, led the responding deputy to conclude there MIGHT have been a domestic violence incident (possible injuries to mom), but no action was taken.

Maybe, since the parents like reality shows so much, SuperNanny should come spend some time with them.

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Leonard Smalls says:

October 17, 2009 at 5:29 am

Seriously, I don’t even want to imagine the issues these kids are going to have as adults.

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1. RedGreen says:
  
  October 17, 2009 at 5:42 am
  
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sxp151 says:

October 17, 2009 at 8:03 am

“and glued themselves to the nearest television set yesterday.”

Good thing those people have learned their lesson and will never again fall for the dumbest of cheesy storylines that are clearly made up to elicit sympathy from whatever Pavlovian reflex those people imagine passes for emotions.

Oh look, a white woman might have been eaten by a shark! I guess that’s also a good reason not to do anything today!

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1. BlueCat says:
  
  October 18, 2009 at 7:08 pm
  
  Otherwise fifteen minutes will do.
  
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parsingreality says:

October 17, 2009 at 5:33 pm

Besides honorariums for being on TV?

OK, he’s a scientist. Well, so am I if the criteria is a lifelong interest in the sciences.

I’ve not see one word on employment or other income streams. Since I don’t pay much attention to this kind of media frenzy, maybe I’ve just missed that info.

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The realist says:

October 18, 2009 at 5:02 am

http://www.thedenverchannel.co…

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1. Aaron says:
  
  October 18, 2009 at 6:11 am
  
  I don’t really care if anyone goes to jail or not, I think making them pay full damages and expenses would suffice.
  
  Can we please get these kids into a home with safe and responsible parents, though? That’s my primary concern.
  
  Side note: Has there still been no explanation why the police didn’t toss the house looking for the kid? Why was that not the first step?
  
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  1. The realist says:
    
    October 18, 2009 at 6:10 pm
    
    that they did a thorough search but based on the “debris” they saw in the garage in the area of access to the attic, they didn’t think a boy could be up there. I don’t think he was specific about what items he meant by debris, but I wouldn’t be surprised if they eventually conclude that items were placed below the attic access to intentionally make it look as if no 6-yr-old could have gotten up there.
    
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    1. parsingreality says:
      
      October 19, 2009 at 4:01 pm
      
      But seriously, did they find a water bottle and a bucket up there? That would sure clinch it.
      
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  2. The realist says:
    
    October 18, 2009 at 6:13 pm
    
    in the Denver Post today. She includes some details about the inappropriateness of the family environment for those kids.
    
    http://www.denverpost.com/greene
    
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    1. ModerateGal says:
      
      October 19, 2009 at 5:41 am
      
      The letter is well written and now I don’t need to watch the disgusting YouTube videos.
      
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      1. The realist says:
        
        October 19, 2009 at 3:48 pm
        
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