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August 29, 2024 12:02 PM UTC

Is JD Vance an Actual Cyborg?

  • 1 Comments
  • by: Colorado Pols
Greetings, fellow humans!

Republican Vice Presidential candidate JD Vance continues to campaign across the country for the GOP Presidential ticket while Donald Trump spends most of his time golfing. All of that practice might be making Trump a better golfer, but it is definitely not making Vance a better candidate.

Vance hasn’t exactly taken America by storm. He’s been making speeches at events with crowd sizes in the dozens of people, and his attempts to come across as an actual human being aren’t working well. Check out this MSNBC clip from earlier in the week comparing and contrasting Vance at a donut shop in Georgia with Democratic Vice Presidential candidate Tim Walz shaking hands at a fast-food restaurant in Nebraska:

Vance appears to have absolutely no idea how to hold a small-talk conversation with another human being. He just keeps asking the same question — “How long have you worked here?” — followed up with the same nodding response. It’s hard not to cringe.

Vance struggles with that whole “humor” thing, attempting jokes with no obvious punchline. He also doesn’t ever seem to really understand his audience:

 

Post by @kamalahq
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Semper Fi, firefighters!

Does Vance think he is addressing a room of Marines? What is happening?

Here’s a tip for Republicans in 2028: Find a running mate who resembles a real, living human being. It may help with voters who are themselves actual human beings.

Comments

One thought on “Is JD Vance an Actual Cyborg?

  1. Of course JD “Dud” Vance is a real class act:

    Vance defends telling Harris to ‘go to hell’ for nonexistent cemetery criticism

    Shortly before he arrived in Boston for his speech, the Army released a rare statement defending a staff member at Arlington National Cemetery who found herself in a brief confrontation Monday with two men working for the Trump campaign, saying that she “acted with professionalism” during the encounter and that her reputation has been “unfairly attacked” by the former president’s representatives.

    Asked if the campaign should apologize to the worker, Vance said no. He said he hadn’t reviewed the incident but it had been overblown.

    The ANC staff member filed a police report (a crime was in fact committed), but she decided it wasn’t worth pressing charges (ed.  SCOTUS would likely declare it an “official act” and assert absolute immunity, anyway)

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