September 26, 2017 11:18 AM UTC

BREAKING: Puerto Rico In "A Very Big Ocean"

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• by: Colorado Pols

Trump on delivering aid to Puerto Rico: “This is an island sitting in the middle of an ocean. It’s a big ocean, it’s a very big ocean.” pic.twitter.com/d3zkbKmQxr

— BuzzFeed News (@BuzzFeedNews) September 26, 2017

“It’s very tough because it’s an island. In Texas, we can ship the trucks right out there, you know, we’ve got A-pluses on Texas and Florida and we will also on Puerto Rico, but the difference is this is an island sitting in the middle of an ocean, and it’s a big ocean, it’s a very big ocean, and we’re doing a really good job.”

As it turns out, Puerto Ricans aren’t originally from Spanish Harlem! Who knew?

Unfortunately, the latest reports from Puerto Rico do not appear to be validating President Donald Trump’s cheery assessment of the situation. As “fake news” CNN reports:

Nearly a week after Hurricane Maria slammed Puerto Rico, the US commonwealth looks something like this: Most are without power and phone service, with little hope of having it restored soon. Food and medicine are dwindling, especially for those isolated by impassable roads. And rescuers still are finding and removing desperate people from their demolished communities.

It is, in short, a humanitarian crisis, San Juan’s mayor told CNN on Tuesday.

“We are finding dialysis patients that haven’t been able to contact their providers, so we are having to transport them in near-death conditions,” Mayor Carmen Yulin Cruz said, recalling a group’s visit to two San Juan-area nursing homes this week. “We are finding people whose oxygen tanks are running out, because … small generators now don’t have any diesel.”

Despite Trump’s relatively swift appearances in Texas and Florida after devastating hurricanes impacted those states earlier this season, it will reportedly be another week before the president can make it to San Juan. By then, hopefully, the “humanitarian crisis” unfolding on this island of over 3 million American citizens will be better under control.

If not, “it’s a very big ocean” could join “Heckuva job, Brownie” in infamy.